I feel my blog is a very positive space as much as I ramble about issues such as anxiety and body confidence I do often put a positive spin on things to encourage self love. I love and am still shocked that sometimes my posts can help someone feel a little more uplifted and allow them to learn just one little thing to make their day better.
Similar to what I’ve written before about the negatives of social media as much as I like to write my posts as if I’m feeling positive it doesn’t mean I always am. We always forget that the perfect life you want others to see on social media isn’t real. And yes I have a bad day, and yes that happens quite often but it’s truly okay. Having a bad day is something we all need and eventually it helps you grow.
I am NOT a positive person and sometimes my negativity gets the better of me. Sometimes I absolutely hate everything about me, I regret my actions and just want a fresh start. I get embarrassed by who I am and just want to hide in my room. Bad things happen and I play on them in my head, making them even worse. I wind myself up over stupid things. Recently I’ve been a little stressed and just had a lot on my mind. I’ve been feeling a little sorry for myself and become so lazy. Keeping my blog updates has been a little tough, I just haven’t had the motivation or creative thoughts to write. But my blog is my space and when I feed down it shows in that, and as much as it’s disheartening it then becomes a true reflection of me.
Something that I’m really struggling with at the moment is my scar from my knee surgery. It’s not massive but goes down my whole knee cap. Yes it could be so much worse but to me I hate it. Bio Oil has become my new addiction and I’m applying it whenever I can. I just want it gone. To me it’s unattractive and draws attention. Instead of dwelling on it I want to get to the stage where I don’t care and I can be proud of it rather than ashamed.
Learning to accept that this will happen is tough. Drilling into my head that I am positive and better than this is hard work, but eventually in the end I’ll get there. There is always going to be days when I’m feeling low that comes naturally with everyone, but its how we pick ourselves up from these which make us who we are.
Yes writing these posts have really helped me become more positive and invest so time in self love. As much as I already have these thoughts reinforcing them makes me understand that I need still make changes to my frame of mind to truly make me happy.
As much as I wanted to express that not every is happy I apologise that I still try and put a positive motivational spin on it. On another note, thank you to everyone that reads my posts and takes the time to comment. I appreciate everything.